Mindful Mondays

All Articles in the Category ‘Mindful Mondays’

Mindful Monday- A Higher Sense of Self

mindfulA Higher Sense of Self

In a year of Living with more Compassion, Michael Yapko, PhD uses the term,” a higher sense of self” to refer to the small but important gestures we make when showing compassion for self and others. This might be getting up a few minutes earlier to make a lunch for your spouse, taking the time from your busy day to acknowledge a friend or colleague, or  “catching yourself” when upset with someone before saying something unkind. All of these are demonstrations of a higher sense of self.

Exercise

Write down examples of the small gestures you’ve extended to yourself or others this week. Note your feelings. For example, you might have felt upset with someone but later proud that you refrained from saying something unkind. Or you may have felt stressed about being able to do something nice for your spouse but after getting up earlier and still getting to work on time, glad that you made the effort. Another exercise is to pay attention to the gestures of others and if appropriate, let them know your observation.

Quote of the week

 “If you can talk, you can sing. If you can walk, you can dance.”    ~Tribal Saying, Zimbabwe

Mindful Monday – Kindness

mindfulKindness

Whether it’s allowing another driver to “cut in” in traffic or the person with just five items to do the same in a grocery store line, it seems little acts of kindness are getting harder to find as our hurry-up-and-wait lives get even more rushed. You know how it feels when someone cuts you off or barges in – we feel annoyed at best and outraged at worst.

Here are some tips for dealing with the daily indignities we all encounter:

  1. Remember it’s not personal. No one is singling us out with the intention of taking advantage of us. We’re all busy and self-centered about making it through our day.
  2. If someone does slight you, and it triggers a strong emotion, try and imagine what’s in their head at that moment. I recently held a door open for a customer in a restaurant nearby and she didn’t say thank you or even acknowledge me. My immediate reaction was “how ungrateful!”. I took a breath and considered that she may have just left our center and been told her child had autism or left her doctor’s office where she was told she had cancer. 
  3. If your immediate reaction is to respond in a less-than-kind way, try a mental “halt!” and do the opposite. Say or do something kind. Pay attention to the reaction you then get. 

Quote of the Week:

“Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.”

– His Holiness the Dalai Lama

 

 

Mindful Monday – Expectations & Possibilities

Expectations & Possibilities

Phillip Moffitt, in a year of Living Mindfully tells us that “the (mostly unconscious) expectations that fill our mind direct what we pay attention to and how we interpret things, preventing us from living from our intentions”. Expectations can lead to disappointment, defeat, and a heavy burden to carry around. Where do these come from? All over! We’re bombarded by messages that tell us to be this or do that and much is focused on achievement in some way. Read full post »

Mindful Monday – Critical Thoughts and Self-Compassion

Coffee-with-views-of-the-rainCritical Thoughts and Self-compassion

Insecurity often underlies critical thoughts and in our achievement-oriented world, it’s easy to feel as if we don’t measure up. If a core belief at the heart of critical thoughts is that we are “not good enough”, it could be that we’re using an unrealistic measure of our worth. If in our mind’s eye, we associate perfection with what we “should be” then we set ourselves up for disappointment. It’s fine to have goals and ambitions but we shouldn’t make self-acceptance dependent on them. Read full post »

Mindful Monday – Think Before You…

Think Before You . . . Speak, Text, Email, Tweet

Seems today the old saying “think before you speak” needs updating to include reply all, text, tweet, etc. It’s so easy to fire off words without giving them much forethought. Another old adage, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it” also seems to have gone by the wayside (which I think is an idiom).

We now have the ability to deliver lightning-fast replies and feel a sense of accomplishment when we get those pesky emails and texts out of the way. Do you ever go back and read what you’ve sent? Ever catch a typo (thanks, autocorrect) or realize that your quick words might not have captured what you intended to say or might be confusing. Ever get a reply text that only says, “?” meaning, “I have no idea what you’re talking about”.

With in-person conversations, do you ever feel a need to fill a pause rather than let the silence be? May be that at times, working in a service profession as we do, we feel uncomfortable with the quiet, Read full post »